


funy fire emblem

by FrostHatchet



Category: Fire Emblem Heroes
Genre: Crack, F/M, I've set my sights higher, Robin pulls the sneak route on chapter 10, Tharja is in the game, and so is Hubert, funny fire emblem, just don't ever read this without severe loss of judgement, summoner is not good at his job
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-09-06
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:48:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25794640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrostHatchet/pseuds/FrostHatchet
Summary: Hubert and Tharja harass each other and do many dumb things.  Robin has a good plan to fix it tho.  I take no responsibility for what monster I have created.  Read and your own Peril.
Relationships: Hubert von Vestra/Tharja
Comments: 19
Kudos: 10





	1. Chapter 2

**Author's Note:**

> A new path to tread

In the marketplace of Askr, Hubert was going to fetch some food for Edelgard because she deserved it for all the difficult work she had done over the past couple of days since they were summoned to this strange place. 

Hubert still wondered how summoning worked and why this world was the nexus to all the other realities that they had encountered people from, but no one could explain it to him or even really help him at all. He was torn between his undying loyalty to Edelgard and his curiosity about the world they now inhabit. 

Hubert was snapped out of his own thoughts when he saw Robin and his daughter Morgan. He smiled a little as he saw them because Robin had been one of the first people he saw when he was first summoned and asked for his help to figure it out. 

Hubert declined in favor to serve Edelgard, but Robin and himself had become friends. Robin spotted him and waved. Hubert grinned and gave him a two-fingered greeting before continuing his errand for Lady Edelgard. 

His smile turned into a frown when he noticed something in the distance begin the slowly move as if it were following the pair on their walk. It was in the bushes and it followed them without much thought for stealth or concealment. Hubert looked closer and saw a pair of eyes with a baneful look to them staring at Robin and Morgan. 

He decided to stalk the stalker and stood behind the bushes that the stalker was using as cover. He could hear the words "How dare you stand next to my Robin," being muttered and he grinned. This wasn’t an assassin sent to kill them both, it was a really creepy woman trying to date Robin a little too obsessively. 

He coughed and she fell out of the bushes with a yelp and tried to place a dark magic spell on him. He expertly repealed the desperate strike and waited for another. It never came and he looked at the woman with curiosity, as he had learned in the academy, gossip was a powerful currency in any social environment. He looked at her for about a second before turning red from his embarrassment and turning away. 

She said in a borderline aggressive tone, “What was that for?! Why did you scare me like that?! Why won’t you look at me?” Hubert replied with, “I have never looked at any woman who is indecent and I will not start now. Go put some clothes on if you wish to talk.” 

She blushed with anger and retorted, “This is the official Plegian dark mage attire!” Hubert muttered, “These Plegians must be smarter than I thought.” He dodged a slap and a tirade of comments as he fled the marketplace and returned to his quarters. 

He stayed thinking about the strange woman from before and relished the enjoyment he got from teasing her. He regretfully thought about how his time with Lady Edelgard wasn’t nearly as fun to hang around with as this mystery woman. 

He shook off the thought and reminded himself that his loyalty to Lady Edelgard must be unwavering, but the thought still remained. Even when he rose at dawn to prepare for a training tower run later that week, he remembered that one rebellious feeling he had when he encountered the woman. 

Still, Hubert thought, if he ever wanted to find her again, he would only have to get to Robin and she would be close behind him at all times. He sighed, thinking about his own relationship with Lady Edelgard and compared it with Robin and this woman. 

They were different in so many ways, even her magic use was sloppy and uncoordinated for a mage and he was only a student. While this woman held lust for Robin, he only wished to serve Lady Edelgard to the fullest. He never wanted her affection in that way, he only wished to serve her needs as a retainer. 

He shook his head clear of these distracting thoughts and went to talk to the summoner about the training tower run later in the week.


	2. he clearly likes it!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hubert and Tharja have more funy interactions and a mysterious figure arrives at the end ooooooo
> 
> Please comment I have no friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Such power dwells within?

“What do you mean we don’t have a fourth member to fight with us!?” Hubert yelled at Kiran while Kiran backpedaled. 

“We’ll find somebody else to go with you, it’s not a huge deal.” Hubert looked at him and said, “If I cannot prove myself to Lady Edelgard as a valuable retainer and a powerful dark magic user, then I will have failed.” Kiran pondered this for a second as Hubert calmed down. 

“We’ll find somebody else, I promise. Whoever it is, they won’t make you look bad. If they would, I wouldn’t have summoned them, right?” 

Hubert shook his head and grinned at that. “I can think of a few who would qualify,” (Namely Raigh and Wrys) “But I trust you to make a good call.” Hubert walked out of the room and Kiran sighed. “Why do I play this stupid game.” 

Tharja had reclaimed a spot in the bushes to watch Robin and his wife, Cordelia share a meal. She seethed with anger at the affection Robin had with someone that wasn’t her. ‘And that other guy who made fun of my clothes and discovered me.’ She thought to herself. 

‘And what getup was he wearing? Was he supposed to look like a vampire student or was that just her?’ She shook herself out of the lull she had found herself in and continued watching the two swap stories and cringed when one would laugh. 

She then jumped to the sound of someone clearing their throat. She snapped around to look behind her and she was ready to beat the pulp out of the vampire kid until she realized it wasn’t him at all. 

It was Kiran with a raised eyebrow and arms crossed. She dropped her guard and said, “Sorry Kiran, I get jumpy when people cough behind my back. Need something?” 

He just smiled and said, “Would you like to participate in a training tower run this afternoon?” She immediately said, “No, I’m busy.” Kiran raised an eyebrow. “Oh? Something to do? I don’t remember any assignments being given to you for a while now. So what is so urgent that you would dodge another one?” 

He feigned realization and said, “Oh, I think I get it now. You want to spy on Robin. Are you sure that is the best way to win his heart?” She blushed heavily and said, “Fine, I’ll go, just don’t tell anyone about this.” 

‘Especially that vamp kid,’ she thought. Kiran smiled. “Good, then if you would follow me please, the rest of the preparations are almost complete.” She obliged and grabbed her grimoire tome while she half-ran to keep up with Kiran. 

She didn’t like being manipulated, but Kiran was the one who summoned her to Askr to be with Robin, so she couldn’t stay mad at him. 

The room was full of the charter of Est and Nino as Hubert tapped his foot with impatience. The other two weren’t concerned that another hero hadn’t shown up to take the place of Hinata, who had to go complete a new paralogue challenge that same day. 

Hubert grimaced. ‘Training was supposed to start ten minutes ago!’ He thought, “Where the devil is Kiran with the substitute?’ 

A few moments later the door opened and Kiran walked in with a familiar face behind him. Hubert almost laughed when he saw Tharja glare his direction. She turned to face Kiran and snapped, “He is here? You didn’t tell me that vampire was with us!” 

Kiran chuckled and said, “I believe you two haven’t met before? Tharja, this is Hubert and Hubert, this is Tharja. Please get along so I don’t have to scrape you off the battlefield today.” 

He left the room and silence prevailed for a minute. Then Tharja yelled,” Why are you here on this mission? The one time I go on a mission without Robin and I get stuck with you!” Hubert just smirked and said, “Try not to get chopped up out there. It would be terribly dreadful if you were killed today. I would be robbed of my new plaything.” 

She fumed where she stood. “I’m a plaything to you? You should see me in battle you little twerp.” Hubert laughed and said, “I think I may have to,” as the doors opened to reveal enemies with shining weapons. “Now then, shall we?” He said to an angry cat wearing about as much as a cat would. She shook it off and charged into battle. 

In the distance near the training tower, a figure cloaked in a dark robe was crouched and listening to everything going on. 

They then smirked and whisked off into the night. The next morning Kiran was working at his desk trying to figure out this mess of an army when the same cloaked figure walked through the doors. Kiran looked up and the figure said, “I have a proposition for you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Practice yields results


	3. Exactly what I signed up for

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tharja gets dirt on Hubert and they share great moment
> 
> please comment I have nothing left

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another step forward

As soon as the training battle ended, Hubert ran out of range of Tharja just to be safe. I did just piss her off in a royal way, he thought. 

Hubert rounded the corner and in the next corridor, he heard the voice of one person. Lady Edelgard and Byleth were walking towards the library. Only Edelgard was speaking, Byleth was silently looking at her as if he wanted to say something to her but couldn’t. 

That stupid fool! Hubert fumed, Get away from my lady! She deserves better than trying to talk to you. While Hubert was focused on his fuming, Edelgard was agonizing about why Byleth could never seem to give her a straight answer, and Byleth shrugged and said, “There is still much to learn.” Edelgard threw up her hands and walked away in frustration. 

What did he just do to my Edelgard?! Hubert thought as he strode towards him and asked sharply, “What did you say to upset Lady Edelgard? Tell me now!” Byleth shrugged again and said, “It seems I’ve exhausted this topic” Hubert huffed and walked back to the barracks to rest after his battle. Why can nobody ever get a straight answer out of him? Thought Hubert as he walked off to bed. 

Unbeknownst to him, there was another cloaked figure hiding behind a column and she was smiling. “Finally got you right where I want you now, Count Dracula.” She sneered and whisked off into the night. 

The next morning, Hubert got out of bed and went to find Lady Edelgard’s room. On the way there, he spotted a familiar-looking scantily clad mage with a huge smirk on her face. Knowing it couldn’t be good, but it didn’t look like she was going to kill him, Hubert stopped moving and waited for it to happen, whatever it was. 

Tharja stopped in front of him and said in a snide tone, “I know what you did last night vamp.” Hubert’s mind immediately flashed back to him watching Edelgard and Byleth. She can’t know about that! It would be damaging to Lady Edelgard’s reputation to have a servant who loves her. 

They would think it diverts attention from my task of protecting her. He couldn’t stand himself if that ever happened. 

Then a memory from his school life popped back in his head. He and Casper were talking about Edelgard and he had said, “Just ask her nicely, and if she says no, then at least it’s out there. If it’s not out there then, uh … it’s not good.” he finished. 

Hubert decided that pushing his pride aside for the sake of Lady Edelgard was the best course of action at this point. 

He took a deep breath and said, “Please don’t tell anyone. If people found out, then Edelgard would be held back by me, and that is the opposite of my aim. I hope you can understand.” 

Tharja’s smirk had vanished and it had been replaced with a look of extreme surprise. “I didn’t mean it like that, I just meant you like someone that you can’t have either, and that upsets you. I know what that’s like. 

"I can’t be with Robin and I want to be with him so bad, but it’s not possible. I still feel that longing every single day of my life that everything would be perfect if we could just settle down and invent hexes to test on each other. I just want that so badly, and so do you. 

"You can’t be with your Lady so you spy on her and curse her husband. I was just happy to find out someone else was like me is all.”

Hubert followed her rant with fluctuating levels of shock and embarrassment. When she was done, he finally said, “I love Edelgard, but I know she can’t be with me. My only desire is to protect and aid her in any way possible to feel gratitude. If we can’t be together that way, then we can be together in another way. I don’t pine after her like you do to Robin, but I do care for her a lot.” 

Tharja looked disappointed and said, “Then why did you yell at Byleth if you weren’t in love with her?” Hubert snorted, “That’s because he never makes sense when he talks. It’s always some sort of cryptic nonsense that means nothing to most of us. He did it at school as well.” 

Tharja giggled, and Hubert almost jumped out of his skin at the sound. It was so unlike her to giggle at common gossip when she worked on curses that gave her enemies varying amounts of pain and suffering. 

Hubert said in an undertone, “Please just promise not to tell anyone about what you saw last night. I really don’t want Edelgard to be distressed about my feelings.” Tharja giggled again and said, “Of course I won’t, but only if you do something for me in the meantime. Can you meet me here tomorrow night? Late.” She said the last part in a way that made even Hubert severely uncomfortable. 

He coughed and said, “Of course I can be here, why not tonight instead? Surely it would be better for you if it were closer?” She giggled and said, “I need time to get ready for the big event.” Hubert was beyond puzzled and looked at her again. 

“See you then,” She blew him a kiss and he coughed on it and walked back to the barracks, too shaken to feel much else other than sleepiness. Never before had someone bamboozled Hubert as much as this woman. Hubert was amazed at how utterly bewildered she made him the last time they spoke. He shook off the thought once he fell onto his bed covers and passed out immediately at noon that day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The glory of progress


	4. Stand Name: Bojangles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What is Robin doing? You'll have to find out ooooooooo
> 
> I'm almost through this nightmare of a fic so please hang with it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Robin tho

Hubert woke up to find that the time had changed to dark. He got out of bed and stretched his arms up in a yawning motion. I guess I was out for longer than I thought, Hubert thought as he put on his Garreg Mach uniform and headed out into Askr. 

While Hubert was walking around for some fresh air to comprehend what had happened to him that morning, he saw Robin walking briskly towards the barracks. Hubert hid behind a pillar to avoid attracting attention in case Tharja had gone back on her word. It turns out that Robin was going directly to where his room was in the barracks. 

Hubert intrigued, walked after him, slightly jogging to keep up with the tactician's brisk pace. As he followed him, Hubert caught words from the tactician, and he did not like them. He kept hearing things like ‘please don’t be gone’, or ‘I need to see her’. He frowned because Cordelia’s room was not anywhere near this direction, so who was he going to see at this hour. 

Robin stopped at a door and knocked twice. Hubert realized with horror that he was outside Edelgard’s door. She opened it at once and said in an exasperated tone, “Thank goodness you're here, I’ve been waiting for ages!” Hubert watched with fury as she closed the door and smiled at him. 

What could that have possibly meant? Hubert wondered. What excuse would He have to see Her?! He was distracted from anger when he saw a cloaked figure walking toward him. She saw who he was and lifted her hood to reveal Tharja. Hubert let out a sigh of relief. It wasn’t an assassin, it was just Tharja. Then he jumped at the ‘Just Tharja’ part and his guard came back the moment it left. 

She looked at him with confusion until she saw who’s room they were outside of. She asked him, “Why would my Robin go into her room?” Hubert looked at her and asked, “How did you know it was Robin?” She smiled, “I followed him here. But the question still remains, why are they seeing each other at this time?” 

Her question was seemingly answered by a high pitched laugh that made them both jump. “You don’t think?” Hubert began, “That they would be?” Tharja finished, “But Robin is married,” Hubert said, “We have to know what they are doing in there.” They both said. They pressed both of their ears to the door, but they could only hear snippets of conversation. 

They stopped and looked at each other for a second. “Well, what do we do now?” Tharja said. Hubert scratched his head for a few moments before shrugging and gesturing at her for an answer. She shrugged also and they stayed for a while trying to figure out what to do. Hubert piped in and said, “If we confront them tomorrow, then maybe we can get some answers out of them if they are surrounded by people.”

“Good thinking,” said Tharja while nodding. “Well, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow night for the event.” Hubert’s stomach sank to his shoes. He had forgotten all about the ‘event’ Tharja had planned for him tomorrow evening. He shivered as he relieved that unsettling conversation they had shared. 

“Well, I guess I’ll see you then. After you do your thing, we should discuss in greater detail what to do about Robin and Lady Edelgard.” She smiled and said, “No problem vamp.” She walked off and he went back to bed, feeling less drained as he did last time he talked to Tharja. 

Hubert liked the Tharja that was standing next to him thinking much more than the creepy exterior that she kept on for most everybody else. It was as if she let her guard down for the things she thought were the most important to her. Underneath a strange exterior was a cool, calm, and calculating mage who reminded Hubert of himself a lot. 

Hubert smiled at the idea and hoped that Tharja would be that person more often. It would suit her better around the other heroes if she wasn’t so creepy all the time, Hubert thought with a grin as he walked off to his room. 

After Hubert closed the door, a shadow seemed to move out from the rest and a cloaked figure muttered to himself, “I’m always three steps ahead Hubert, I hope you realize that by now.” He then left into the beautiful Askr twilight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No more Byleth quotes today! I"m psyched for this to end


	5. Oh Man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is finally over. The story ends with a not very climactic and not very well-written final chapter. Please read this it's all I have left

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Robin is funny and Hubert is dumb. Also it's way to long

‘Why is Lady Edelgard hanging around that snot-nosed tactician all the time? And what about his “‘Amnesia’”, how can that be real? He has to be making things up just to get attention. That little self-righteous prick thinks he can hoodwink my Lady?”

Hubert had followed Edelgard around more recently because of her frequent visits to see the tactician, Robin. Hubert told himself he was spying on them for only the peace, freedom, justice, and security of his new Empress. 

He often ran into Tharja when on these stealth missions, and he started to see just how similar the two of them were. They cared deeply about either Robin or Lady Edelgard, and they both were angry at the other for taking their rightful place. 

Tharja had originally been above average at hiding in plain sight, but Hubert was a mastermind. He sulked around every public place learning about all the new gossip and such from the rest of the heroes. 

He used to look down on Tharja for being less skilled than him both at magic and stealth, but she had grown better every time they went spying. They even did it together, chatting on stakeouts, or pretending to talk while looking for either Robin or Edelgard to surface so they could find a lead for this strange relationship that had seemingly sprung out of nowhere. 

He noticed now that Tharja had been taking his condescending critiques seriously and had improved her stealth tenfold from the days they had been at it. She even taught him a few things about his craft that he never anticipated. Mostly things only a woman would know, but it was still helpful to Hubert. 

Hubert was shaken from his thoughts by Tharja’s voice whispering softly, “They’re here.” Hubert didn’t need another moment to get up from his reclined position in the bushes and sit upright; waiting for a clue or give. 

Robin was talking to Edelgard sheepishly and Edelgard was seemingly pawing at him. Hubert and Tharja fumed at first, but then Hubert remembered how she pursued the professor at the Officer’s Academy. She didn’t use her body, she used her intelligence to try to sway him over.

“This isn’t like her,” Hubert said and Tharja replied, “I know, I wish Robin would just stop and come to me.” Hubert shook his head, “No, she isn’t acting normally. When she pursued others that she really wanted, she didn’t use her body, she used her mind to appeal to them. This is different.”

“It’s like they’re putting on a show for the world to see,” Tharja said through clenched teeth. Hubert thought about this for a moment and then he had it. 

“Tharja that’s it!” Tharja looked puzzled and said, “Yeah, that’s why we’re doing this together right?”, Hubert shook his head again and then Tharja looked at him. 

“You’ve got an idea, haven’t you.” Hubert nodded and fiddled with it some more before saying, “I’ve got it!” 

“What, what is it?” Tharja whispered urgently. “They are putting on a show. They’re acting for someone to find out about. They want to have rumors spread about them to the rest of the heroes that Lady Edelgard is more important and can be with anyone she chooses!” Tharja smacked him and said, “No you idiot! Honestly, your street smarts are impeccable, but your common sense needs a lot of work.”

“They aren’t making sure that rumors get out, they’re making sure we find out about it. This has to be a test of our abilities to stay hidden and gather rumors. That’s what we’re best at, right?”

Hubert’s eyes glowed and he said, “That’s brilliant Tharja! They knew we would try to figure out what they were up to, so they made it target each of us. They then knew that we found out and are now waiting to see if we noticed a difference in their behavior.”

Tharja nodded excitedly and said, “We should have gotten this sooner! Didn’t you notice that they were turning it up a notch recently? They must have been making it easier to figure out what was going on.”

Hubert cursed and said, “If we had gotten this sooner, then we could have been recognized for our actions. But instead, they had to make it easier to figure out ,so they must think we weren’t good enough to get it right.”

Tharja’s wide grin died and her happy energy wilted. Hubert noticed that he hadn’t seen this Tharja for a while. She was either angry and smacking him, being strangely seductive, or agreeable and a great steak out partner. 

She said, “Now what will Robin think of me? He is the master tactician and figuring out one of his schemes could have been just what I needed to get on his good side!” She started to pout and walked away, kicking small bushes on the edge of the path. 

Hubert grinned and whisked away to his room in the barracks. He had a lot of thinking to do before morning came around. 

The Next Day...

Hubert strolled out of his room and walked over to where Robin and Edelgard start their day together beside the miniature Aether Fountain. He waited for them to arrive and when he saw the two white heads on the horizon, he grinned and didn’t even bother to hide this time. 

They finally got to him and Hubert said, “Robin, my Lady, I have a revelation for you. You see, I was just happening about with a companion when I saw you two going at it quite vigorously near the barracks. I couldn’t help but notice that you two have been meeting each other for a week now and have been making your relationship easier and easier to find out about.”

“I know your secret, you have been testing my powers of observation Lady Edelgard, and I daresay I passed with flying colors. Well, did I?” Edelgard looked relieved and Robin snorted. 

“You think you passed a test on observation when you literally didn’t see that the test was not just applied to you, but it was about observation.” He smirked and right on cue Tharja popped out of the bushes and yelled, “I figured it out! You two are cheating and I figured it out! Without Count Dracula's help!” 

Hubert was miffed and said, “I figured it out well before you did!” 

Tharja fumed and said, “You said that it was about Edelgard, not you! I slapped you and told you that piece of information myself, so if any of us should get the credit, it’s me!”

Hubert was slowly getting angrier and said, “But I was the one who taught you everything about stakeouts and spying in plain sight! If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t have even been able to compete with me!”

Tharja raised her grimoire and a magic circle appeared in her right hand as Hubert drew his own power into a circle and waited for her to make the first move. 

Robin slowly clapped and stepped in between them. “You both have done a spectacular job figuring out what we were up to. But neither of you have discovered the true purpose of our play.”

Hubert scoffed and said, “What is it then pretty boy?”

Robin snickered and said, “The purpose of this scheme was to get the two of you off our backs more often. Tharja, you need to back off. I’m happily married and will never jeopardize that with a fling with you.” Tharja’s world looked like it was coming crashing down as Robin turned to Hubert and said,

“Your dedication to your Lady is admirable, and it is more annoying than creepy, it still needs to stop. The purpose of this plan was to get the two of you to meet other people to hang around with and to get you off our backs. 

“Besides, I knew that the two of you were perfect once Hubert got summoned into Askr. You both pine after nobles that can never be yours, you both have a disturbing amount of dark magic power, and you both are really good at stealing around and getting information about other heroes. 

Hubert was utterly baffled that his prediction was false. He shot a look at Tharja and noticed that she was now blushing. He was puzzled by that fact and was about to ask her why when Robin told him why. 

“The reason we concocted this plan was that we see you two caught up in our lives, and if we just put you in the right circumstances to find out that the other isn’t so bad. Am I right?” Hubert and Tharja both nodded and Robin continued.

“We wanted you to find someone else to pine after, so we figured it would kill two birds with one stone. We wouldn’t have to be bothered by either of you anymore, and you two get to be happy.” Robin finished with a flourish and grinned at the two dark mages.

Hubert was still baffled and he turned to his Lady and said, “Is that true? Is my service towards you a burden placed on you?” Edelgard waved her had and said,

“No, it’s no burden to have you work for me, but you need something else to be in your life other than me. I saw a chance to make you happy and I grabbed it and made it happen. You may have thought you were so stealthy, but we both saw how you two were getting along on your stakeouts every night.”

Robin and Edelgard then disappeared into smoke and Hubert was left alone with Tharja. Hubert said, “So, I guess you’ll have to pine for someone else now, eh Tharja?” Her eyes started to tear up and she yelled, “It’s you, you stupid vampire! Every time you made a comment about my stupid crush or my outlandish clothing, it wasn’t filled with malice, it was filled with a happy and childish feeling that made my heart burst every time I heard your voice.” 

Hubert was now blushing and said in a flustered and very speedy tone,” I thought you didn’t like it when I teased you. You always lashed out and I thought it was the cutest thing, but I thought that you didn’t like it when I did that sort of thing, so I stopped myself because I thought I was being selfish and I didn’t want to ruin my first friendship with a real person and I just wanted to make you happy even if it wasn’t with me and I just hope that our friendship can still be the same and I-”

Tharja stopped him with a very unexpected kiss and Hubert almost jumped out of his skin before gradually returning the said kiss for a few seconds. They broke apart after a few seconds and looked at each other’s eyes. 

They each remembered the time they spent together with each other, learning and constantly holding their feelings down where the other couldn’t see them. They relished in relief because the other one felt the same way.

Tharja looked at Hubert and said, “Why didn’t you say this sooner you big dope?” Hubert said with a grin on his face, “I didn’t think you felt the same way.” She smirked and said,” I guess I hid my feelings better than I thought.” 

“Same” Hubert said, “I thought I slipped up a couple of times, but you never noticed because you were so focused on keeping your own feelings from showing. 

Tharja looked at him with a smirk and said,” Always the clever one, weren’t you Count?” Hubert smiled and said, “Not as much as you my princess.” She blushed again and said, “So we make it official?” Hubert grinned and said, “As long as you do something about that dress. ‘Official Plegian Attire?’ Who were you fooling?” 

She laughed and said, “I guess the outfit can change, but only for you Count. And you have to ditch the vampire look, OK?” 

Hubert kissed her forehead and said, “Anything for my princess.”

In one very busy office...

“I GAVE YOU THOSE FOR EMERGENCIES ONLY!!! YOU TWO BETTER CLEAN UP THIS MESS THIS INSTANT BEFORE I BLOW BOTH YOUR HEADS OFF AND GLUE THEM TO THE BALISTITIAN CANNON AND SEND THEM INTO THE DRYWALL!!! THIS IS NOT A RAILWAY STATION FOR PRANKSTERS TO RUN THEIR OPS OUT OF!!! YOU COME BACK HERE NOW- I KNOW WHERE TO FIND YOU SO RUNNING DOESN’T HELP YOU!!!” 

Robin and Edelgard ran laughing from the office of a summoner who really had his work cut out for him this time. His office was a complete mess from the two smoke bombs that Robin had used. ‘From Gaius I assume?’ he thought angrily as he sat down among the stacks of papers scattered everywhere. 

“At least someone got a happy ending to their story,” he muttered as he gathered his paperwork together and, grumbling all the while, went back to work on the impossible task of managing an army of this size.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You said it! No clue what to write next, but I hope it's not as garbage as this hot pile of mess. I'll come up with something eventually

**Author's Note:**

> Let the lesson begin!


End file.
